And so it begins: “McDonalds, the place”.

One of the greatest inventions to come from mankind in recent years is undoubtedly youtube. Certainly, it is the repository of many annoyingly unfunny videos , yet on youtube can be found unique and obscure videos that can enrich our lives and bring us to back to our past, connecting to us to our historical roots.

Two weeks ago, I stumbled across this video and it’s brother. Since finding both, I have been in a state of awe and amazement and have come back several times to show it to friends.

The videos do not have much description to them. Their contributor, who I have unsuccessfully tried to contact, purports that they are of a fight that took place in the Cleveland area in 1989. By the looks of it they are high school students. I would say that based upon their dress it is either late summer or late spring. The dress and vehicles in the video certainly indicate that it is the late 1980’s: Body Glove shirts, Astrovans and IROCs to name a few.

I believe that the two combatants are Rich and Dan, although upon multiple analysis, I can’t be too confident as I heard screams of “Get him, Scotty” also. Originally, I thought that the shorter fighter’s name was Rick Hoever, but it appears he’s one of the young men at the beginning of the video who introduce the fight and handicap it for the viewer.

So let’s get started.

The video begins with several high school students making predictions as to who would win in the fight, the Davidian Rich or the Goliath Dan, who according to them stands 6′-4″ and weighs 240.

We learn that Rich has a fighter’s heart and find comfort and inspiration in his underdog persona.

More analysis from area experts with great fashion sense follows…

…Sorta like Bob Costas and a little bit of Peter Gammons rolled up with some Bryant Gumbel, aye?

Our “protagonist” Rich makes his entry stage right Camaro ——>>>>>

<———- Our “antagonist”, Dan or Scotty, rides up real slow into the McDonald’s parking in his chariot, an IROC-Z.

Things get hot a little prematurely, as Rich threatens his underdog status by taking a cheap shot at Dan through the window of his car, where he is trying to get a pre-fight kiss from his girlfriend.
Rich allows Dan to get out of his car and they square off to begin the battle of the ages.

As expected, Dan takes the advantage quickly in the skirmish

The tables turn quick however, as the wolverine turns on the panther, who runs.

For a moment, it looks as if the little king will have no problem dispatching his bully ———>

Rich lands a hard right hand punch and sends his towering tormentor reeling

Dan regains control however, and fends off Rich’s Conversion Van Clutch————->

As we can see, Dan regains his composure.

But not for long:

Dan is now in retreat.

But Dan seems to draw on some special powers from which street fighters and scumbags do benefit:

He ditches the Body Glove shirt his mother bought him at Caldor

The tired warriors pause for a while to regain their strength

I like how Dan looks as if he’s waiting during a free throw.

The mullet craze has been dead for several years, but I still had to emphasize this one:

Dan’s girlfriend gets in between after the fight has dragged on for more than six minutes.

I don’t think she had a mullet, though this lady did:

The fight does come to end, the Fight of the Century in fact, when the softball coach (I’m assuming she was) breaks it up.

I would urge all of you to watch it though. And if you may know the story behind it, please holler back at me. I need to know. I honestly believe these youtube videos possess a great deal of Americana.

I have so many questions I need answering: What was the fight about? Did they make up afterwards? What’s happened to them?