At this time last year, I believe that I was about 215 lbs. I can’t be certain of that, but six months or so before that I was 224. I now weigh in at the lightest I have in three years, but I’m still not content. I’d like to be down to 175 at the most, though I know in doing so my body will fight me each day to the last calorie. Simply put, within me are habits, bad ones, that seem to define my body.

Like just this morning, maybe 3 a.m., I polished off the remainder of a box of cinnamon Life cereal. I was legitimately hungry I suppose, but it was still not a good idea when in my funky green fridge were oranges. Consuming the tasty squares at 3 a.m. is bad enough, but to do so without milk, now that’s just pathetic.

And yet, that’s what I did. I wolfed down the remainder of the box without recourse to my attempt to cut out carbohydrates for the next nine days (I swear I’ll do it again like last time!, except we’re supposed to have pizza at work next Friday and how can I resist a slice or two?!)

So, gluttony took my over last night and when I awoke this morning the first thought that I had was that I’d failed. I’d done so well, too, well, except for the piece of mushroom pizza I’d had after the movie last night, before the Life incident. Lately, however I have employed the philosophy that if you dwell on your mistakes you’re more doomed to repeat them, again and again.

I showered, dressed and set off for work on foot, a two-mile path through Albany (pictured below).

For the past three days I’d walked to work in an attempt to get as much exercise and sun as possible and really found myself enjoying my trips too and from my office. I am hoping that despite the fact that it’s not the dead of winter yet in Upstate New York, I’ll be able to do that walk at least three times each week. We’ll see. Today my feet were soaking wet all throughout day from the fresh slush on the sidewalks, but by the time I got out, the sunlight had all but melted what was left of it. I headed back walking quickly (I’d also walked 1.5 miles on my lunch break for the third day in a row). It felt great to be out, even though the temperature had by sunset dipped beneath freezing.

When I got home, I decided that to speed up some of my weight loss (I’ve lost five pounds since the new year), I’d go for a run.

I ended up doing a three mile run in the freezing cold and by about the halfway point the gusts were killing me and through my forest green soccer shorts, my penis was practically frozen. Still, it was worth it, and I’m proud of myself for my accomplishment. I try to run as much as possible but this winter I’ve had to mostly settle for the eliptical at the gym. It was great though. Now, if I can refrain from any early morning snacking, I may just be set to dip below 194.4.